Friendship’s Lessons
I am a borderline introvert. My best way to recharge is to be alone, quietly reading, enjoying nature, doing yoga/meditation, etc. One nice thing about getting older is that I become more self-contained and centered and rewarded by my time alone. However, as I get older, I just keep meeting more people. In order to keep my life manageable, I find myself being ultimately selective about whom I embrace as a friend: those with whom I feel a deep connection and share values. I already have so many wonderful friends with whom I have difficulty keeping in touch, I don’t want to add to it. This brings me to an interesting quandary, though.
Now that I have children, I find myself more a part of my community. A neighborhood, a school community, a church community, then there low fee payday loan30 day payday loanday loan payday quick same,cash day loan payday same,same day payday loanpayday loan in 1 hour,1 hour payday loan,1 hour loan paydayadvance cash loan payday wiredadvance loan online paydaypayday loan up to 1000,payday loan 1000 dollar,1000 loan paydayloan until paydaycalgary payday loanadvance cash loan loan paydayloan online payday,online payday loan application,online payday loan no faxingapproval instant loan paydayguaranteed payday loanyahoo payday loancash until payday loangeorgia loan payday,georgia in loan online paydayquick payday advance loanadvance fax loan no paydayez money payday loanfaxless payday loan same day,faxless loan no payday teletrack,faxless loan paydayloan payday,easy payday loan,quick payday loanfax loan no payday,fax loan no payday quick,guaranteed no fax payday loanadvance loan paycheck paydaypayday loan in georgialoan until payday,loan payday until,loan payday say until wordpressloan money payday treeinstant faxless payday loanколи под наемfaxless loan online paydayinstant no fax payday loanno fax required payday loancash america payday loan,america cash loan paydayno faxing instant payday loanchicago in loan payday store,chicago loan payday storecash fast loan paydayno credit check payday loanonline payday loan instant approvalpayday loan without fax,fax less payday loan,fax payday loanhour loan one payday,faxless hour loan one payday,hour in loan one paydayfee loan low paydaymilitary payday loangioco baccarat in linea gratisgiochi baccaratgiochi jack black in linealista casino onlinegiochi casino online gratisvideo poker freewarecasino on line legalicasino on line roulettegioco baccarat in lineamigliori casino on line will be kids sports or music ensembles/communities, etc. Because we share a common experience in the community or in an activity, it makes sense that friendships may develop, especially if you find like-minded people. However, friendships also develop with people with whom I don’t have anything in common other than we are in the same place with children of about the same age. The region we share, the Silicon Valley, is the center of stress and fast living. The focus on achievement and materialism causes many people to push themselves beyond the bounds of good sense. I am always meeting people in the thick of the achievement and acquisition race. Its easy to get caught up in it and forget what your values are (if you’ve ever considered defining them at all).
So what are my values? A life of self-inquiry. Living in the truth of who I am (who we are all) at the deepest level. Many years ago, about the time I met my husband, JJ, I made a vow to myself: ” I choose to always hear and know Your ultimate Truth, Divine Love. With every breath that I take, I embrace Spirit and know Truth & Love.” My treasured teacher, Gangaji, has recently reacquainted me with that truth–Who I AM, Who We All Are. I am not this body, this mind, but that which is eternal and and connected to all things.
The people whom I’m meeting are good neighbors and community members. We don’t necessarily get to choose our neighbors/school mates/ community members. And, if we could, would everyone look the same? Would that be a healthy, diverse community? What I seek is the balance between choosing friends who share my values and temperament, and nurturing friendships with community members, embracing, and even celebrating, each others’ differences.
Being in life with those in our community who are different is my opportunity for growth. I’m learning not to compare myself (requiring constant attention). I’m learning to stay centered and grounded in my body (lots of reminders there). I’m learning not to try to change them or me to fit some unrealistic ideal (daily confrontations). I’m learning to celebrate and embrace others’ differences.
How about I just go back to the beginning: Stop, Breathe. Want nothing more than what’s here and now.